Humour and open-mindedness

Caring is a field where many unusual and humorous things happen. For instance, occasionally the odd aged single gentleman will ask a female carer to marry him, wish her to add something more saucy to the cooking, washing up and vacuuming, accompany him on holidays – even drive him interstate.

Some carers have taken a client with dementia out for shopping only to discover with embarrassment that they are kleptomaniacs (the client not the carer!). In a facility’s secure dementia ward it is a common occurrence for some residents to try to escape – either through the usually locked door to the ward when a visitor or nurse enters the room or even as I witnessed one afternoon when I was visiting a resident, over the 1.5 metre high back fence. This was extremely funny as the resident on the top of the pile of boxes that were being used as a form of ladder by two residents, gave way and the gentleman became stuck on top of the fence and was calling for help.

Humour is the child in all of us. It is also good for us. It lowers blood pressure, makes us happy and positive, releases tension, stimulates respiration, relaxes arteries, and improves our blood flow and oxygen saturation of peripheral blood. Clown Doctors have even made a foundation of it, the Humour Foundation, proving humour to have great benefits of wellbeing to sick and dying children. Of course this also applies to adults. As well as all the above benefits that laughter brings, positive effects on hypertension, depression and diabetes have been observed along with a reduction in pain, which can all come in handy when you may find yourself in a more difficult position, such as during a six hour respite session with someone with dementia and you become locked in a house without a mobile phone and are mistakenly identified as a former girlfriend from 1945, with all the implications that go along with that.

Another time you may have to slip a uridome onto a client’s penis or insert a suppository into someone’s anus. On many occasions a carer must change a client’s disposable pad and/or pants and clean up faeces, clean up vomit, listen to the ranting of delirium or dementia, witness paranoia, crude language or behaviour or cope with a client’s bizarre hallucinations.

Try to keep in mind at all times, “Laugh and the world laughs with you!” You will then find that laughter also enhances your and your client’s communication together and help to keep you emotionally stable!

Clients come in all shapes, sizes and conditions. Some are avidly religious and pious and may try to force you to their belief system while you are cornered and contained within their walls while you work. Some wish to die and may even ask your help to achieve this wish, some are in palliative care and wish to live longer. Others challenge you, set you up by leaving a lot of money around to test your trustworthiness, leave things hidden under or behind furniture to test how well you clean, or are just plain downright rude or belligerent. You don’t have a choice of the type of client you get to care for so it is therefore preferable not to be too proud or “high and mighty” in attitude. Alternatively it is not good to be crude or ill mannered.

It is important to stay open-minded, polite and learn to cope with varying situations that come your way with differing types of people. Be adaptable, open minded and smile a lot.

From the book "Strong Hands, Gentle Heart" by Toni Cary
Available through Aspire publishing